Tuesday, June 21, 2022

Jeopardy Recap - June 21, 2022 - Megan, Rob, and Jenny

MAYIM BIALIK - Good afternoon! In honor of Juneteenth, I'm wearing old curtains in the style of Miss Scarlett O'Hara!

JENNY - Didn't she, like, own slaves?

ROB - And wasn't Juneteenth two days ago? 

MAYIM - I'd expect that kind of woke-ism from budget Paris Geller over there, but from you, Rob? People your age are supposed to be blaming Biden for gas prices on Facebook. 

PRODUCER MICHAEL - Mayim, I've gotten word from Wardrobe that they don't want to take responsibility for the outfit you chose today. 

MAYIM - Oh great. Wardrobe are libtards, too?

PRODUCER MICHAEL - They're saying it's because it's ugly.  

MAYIM - Ahem. Moving on. The first category is Children's Books. 

MEGAN - What is War and Peace?

MAYIM - That's not a children's book.

MEGAN - For me, it was. 

JENNY - **under breath** Fucking nerd. 

MEGAN - I heard that. 

MAYIM - Next up - black women! 

PRODUCER MICHAEL - Oh god, this could go so terribly wrong.

MAYIM - **shows photo of Tamron Hall** Who is this black woman?

MEGAN - Rosa Parks? 

PRODUCER MICHAEL - I want to die. 

MAYIM - Even I know it's probably best to move on. The category is Transplants. This St. Louis-born singer, dancer and actress lived in France. 

MEGAN - Maya Angelou. 


MEGAN - Toni Morrison

MAYIM - The category isn't even black women anymore! Stop guessing random black women!

JENNY - You've got a problem hearing the names of black women? 

PRODUCER MICHAEL - Missing Mike Richards more and more by the second. 

MAYIM - Let's meet our contestants. Rob, you look like a cross between Ric Okasek and Richard Belzer.

ROB - Is... that a question?

MAYIM - Nope! Jenny, you are a preschool teacher. Isn't that INTERESTING!?

JENNY - I feel like you're mocking me.

MAYIM - Would a neuroscientist mock a professional ass-wiper of our impressionable, incontinent youth? 

MEGAN- Can you ask a question now that proves I know who Zendaya is? 

MAYIM - We'd save a lot of time if you'd just buy a box of Nice N' Easy in Nutmeg. 

JENNY - Can we wrap this up? I've experienced enough ageism, racism and classism for one nationally-televised day.

MAYIM - What I wouldn't give to change places with Richard Dawson right now. And he's dead. Final Jeopardy category is Geography Words.

ROB - It better be isthmus. I love to say isthmus.

MAYIM - It's not isthmus. 

JENNY - Avuncular? 

MAYIM - ... No.

MEGAN- Archipelago!

MAYIM - Yes! You've now beaten Rob by two dollars, the amount of money Richard Dawson used to slip pretty moms and aunts to rub on their fannies under the bright Survey lights. 

ROB - God damn it. I put on my best Jerry Seinfeld-branded blazer and black crewneck for this shit? 



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