
Amanda and Kyle talk about their relationship...
AMANDA - Are you ready to grow up? I'm 22. The clock is ticking.
KYLE - Yes. Plus, I need you to move in with me. I've learned guacamole won't make itself.
AMANDA - Just know that once you lose my trust, you can never get it back. Unless you black out and sleep with another girl. Then I will trust you right away and post coupley pics on social media.
KYLE - Can we stage a pic where you're looking down and tucking your hair behind your ear, and I'm kissing the top of your head in front of a graffiti wall?
AMANDA - It's already on the calendar for the third Man Crush Monday in April.
KYLE - Made for each other.
Carl gets to the summer house...
CARL - Sales. Quotas. Quotas. Sales. **walks in on Jordan masturbating to internet church** WHOA!
JORDAN - I, uh, was just listening to a virtual sermon. I'm very spiritual.
CARL - I'll say.
JORDAN - Please don't tell anyone. I have a very macho, manly image to protect.
CARL - Don't worry. You caught me at the end of the quarter. Sales. Quotas. Quotas. Sales. **walks out**
JORDAN - Damn you, sexy Joel Osteen.

On the beach, the gang prepares for a confrontation...
JORDAN - Hey, uh, what's that sport people play with paddles on the beach?
HANNAH - Tennis?
JORDAN - No, NOT tennis. A personality would serve you well.
PAIGE - Jordan, that was a very sassy quip.
JORDAN - Aw, thank you, dear. **clams up** Er, I meant, MANLY GRUNT. **they leave before shit goes down**
LINDSAY - Let's clear the air.
KYLE - Sorry. That guacamole is potent.
DANIELLE - No, she means about our very adult feud about internet validation.
KYLE - I can't believe you unfollowed Amanda on Instagram. On one Flashback Friday, she posted a collage of me when I was five and her when she was five. And you missed that.
LINDSAY - You're right. Here, in front of the ocean and that syringe over there, I promise to never miss another Wine Down Wednesday or Tickle Taint Tuesday again.
KYLE - That's all I ask.

The house occupants throw a 4th of July party...
KYLE - There is no day of the year better for partying than the day our forefathers freed the slaves and ratified the constitution of the amendments.
AMANDA - Ooooh history talk. VERY grown up.
DANIELLE - **to Lindsay** You know, I don't know if Jordan can handle me. I am a mythical mermaid creature who doubles as the most boring person on Earth.
LINDSAY - Well, he did just "get it in the hole" while we were playing bags.
DANIELLE - Did you just use a sexual entendre about Jordan? Oh god, you love him, too!
LINDSAY - I don't know if you've noticed, but lame sexual entendres make up 35% of the show.
DANIELLE - If you like him, I'll back off. Clits before closet cases.
LINDSAY - I mean, I like him, but—
DANIELLE - Sweet, thanks. **makes out with Jordan**
THE END.
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