Wednesday, June 25, 2014

The Real Housewives of New York City Recap, Episode 16 - "Go Yell it on the Mountain"

Sonja Tremont Morgan

The ladies eat dinner at the Antler Cabin...

KRISTEN TAEKMAN - **hugs Luann** Connecticut Sisters!

SONJA MORGAN - Yeah, not something to brag about.


SONJA MORGAN - At least in Albany we learn how to not take our facialists too seriously.

COUNTESS LUANN - Sonja, if you were really my friend, you'd shut down that facialist for libeling me!

SONJA MORGAN - I learned from my lawsuit with John Travolta that it's not libel if it's true.

COUNTESS LUANN - Oh. Well, it's still not very nice! **storms off**

SONJA MORGAN - Geez. Somebody's testicles are in a twist.

KRISTEN TAEKMAN - It's ok.  I think she's just jealous of you and Ramona. And maybe upset that you call her a dude whenever you get a chance.

SONJA MORGAN - I really wish we were at a restaurant. Might be a short French guy with a chode to distract her.

Ramona, Sonja and Carole go skeet shooting...

COWBODY PAUL - And now it's time for Miss Marilyn Monroe to try her hand at skeet shooting.

RAMONA SINGER - It's too hot out here. I'm not 32, you know.

COWBODY PAUL - Coulda fooled me.

RAMONA SINGER - This gun noise is so frickin' loud I can barely hear you. Jesus.

COWBODY PAUL - Ok, Beautiful. Just lift your gun up a little - Gotta make room for those lovely lady lumps.

RAMONA SINGER - Ugh, this is so BORING.

COWBODY PAUL - Not from where I'm standing. Mmmm hmmm.

SONJA MORGAN - Do my slightly-too-close-together eyes deceive me, or is this cowboy hitting on... Ramona???

CAROLE RADZIWILL - I knotted my shirt to reveal my belly button for this?

SONJA MORGAN - At least we still have each other. **leans in**

CAROLE RADZIWILL - Don't touch me, Morgan.

The ladies go Geo Caching in the woods...

HEATHER THOMSON - This is so fucking LAME, yo.

KRISTEN TAEKMAN - Heather, I want to find the treasure. There might be a peace pipe to go with my headband.

HEATHER THOMSON - Whatever, homey. You just want to do this because there's nothing ELSE you know how to do.

KRISTEN TAEKMAN - Oh yeah? I know how to look good in front of a camera, which judging from your Kabuki makeup at Aviva's house, you could take a lesson on.

HEATHER THOMSON - Pshaw. Can't even RAPPEL off a damn MOUNTAIN. What a LOSER.

KRISTEN TAEKMAN - Shouldn't you be directing your vitriol at Carole's hiking dress?

HEATHER THOMSON - Here's what I say about that, dogg. **takes a sip of Heineken, belches** BRAAAAP.


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