Thursday, January 16, 2014

The Real World: Explosion Recap, Episode 2 - "A Numbers Game"


Ashley and Jenny.



 Jamie confronts Ashley about her dranking...
 
JAMIE - You busy?

ASHLEY -  Kinda. Straightening hair that hasn't been washed in a fortnight ain't easy.

JAMIE - Well, just listen to what I have to say. When you're drunk, you're like a skinnier but more obnoxious Mama June. When you're sober, you're cool.

ASHLEY -  That's funny, because whether I'm drunk or sober, I still think you're an uptight cunt.

JAMIE - Uptight?!? I have tats! And gauges! Massive, gaping gauges!

ASHLEY - Sorry. Uptight.

**Silence, while Ashley straightens**

JAMIE - You know what I've found works to help resolve differences?

ASHLEY - What?

JAMIE - Riding around the city in a fire truck.




In the Castro...

ARIELLE - Welcome to the Castro, roommates! I'm ready to do my lesbian thing, which involves rolling around on the floor.

PEANUT GALLERY JAY - With other chicks?

ARIELLE -  Nope, just by myself. **rolls** 

JENNY - **dances up on some women** Haaaay.

CORY - Stop that! I'm not cool with you dancing with anybody who isn't me. Not with girls, not with your dad at your sister's wedding.

JENNY - Um... Toofuckingbad. And I don't have a sister.

CORY -  I'm the one who's usually in charge.

JENNY - Well, I'm the one who's usually in charge.

CORY - So what do we do?

JENNY - Fuck against a wall in full view of our roommates.

CORY - K.


  
Thomas and Jamie talk S-E-X...

THOMAS - I've only slept with three women in my life.

JAMIE - Loser! We all have infections and viruses and YOU DON'T! What a DORK!

THOMAS - There goes number four.

JAMIE - Noooooo!

THOMAS - Sorry. I want sex to be meaningful.

JAMIE - What if I put on some Luther Vandross?

THOMAS -  Hmmmm.**they fuck**



The next day, at a club, Thomas and Jamie become "official"...

THOMAS - You're my girl.

RANDO -  Hi, I'm Sharon, and I -

JAMIE - **pushes rando** GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HIM, WHORE.

THOMAS - You gotta stop doing that. It's a major turnoff.

JAMIE - Even more than these? **flaps earlobes in his face**

THOMAS -  **shudders**




On the street after the club...

DUDE ON THE STREET I - Woooo! Real World!

ARIELLE - Back off.

DUDE ON THE STREET II -  Hurray! Real World San Francisco Explosion!

ARIELLE -I said, back off, son!

CORY - I'll take care of this, Woman. **pushes dude**

ARIELLE - WEAK. **pushes dude and Cory** That's called growing up in Oakland.



Back at the house, Cory Knocks Over Things...

CORY - I am very mad about Dude On The Street I and Dude On The Sreet II getting in the frame of a segment that was only supposed to be about us!

JENNY - Why don't you sit down?

CORY - No! I am very mad!

JENNY - At least stop punching your fist into your palm.

CORY - Never!

JENNY - I'm going to leave then.

CORY - Fine! **pushes her out of the confessional**

ARIELLE - WEAK.


To be continued...

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