Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Real Housewives of Orange County Recap, Episode 15 - "Hold Your Tongue"

Vicki's gotten her tongue stuck on things, too. During a THREESOME.

 At dinner in Whistler...

VICKI GUNVALSON - **spotting Lauri** Who invited HER?

ALEXIS BELLINO - I did. I'm hoping she'll have more juicy shit to share with us. I mean - ugh, I hate drama! Where's my Bible?

LAURI WARING PETERSON - Vicki, the only reason I started this is because you shared a letter George's ex-mother-in-law's proctologist's fuck buddy wrote with Jeana Keough.

VICKI GUNVALSON -  So? Back then I shared everything with Jeana. Let's just say Donn was very satisfied.

LYDIA MCLAUGHLIN - **shudders**  Eyucch.

LAURI WARING PETERSON - Revenge is a dish best serve cold, seven years later when you really need the money and Andy Cohen is knocking on your door.

VICKI GUNVALSON   - I don't need this. I'm out to whoop it up at Andales.

LYDIA MCLAUGHLIN - Wrong country.


Heather calls Tamra from the car...

HEATHER DUBROW - Hi, Tamra. Just calling to let you know I'm done filming MALIBU COUNTRY, the show only I was asked to appear on.

TAMRA BARNEY - I'm good, thanks for asking. Gretchen is still claiming she was asked to appear on that show, too.

HEATHER DUBROW  - Wrong! They only work with professional actors on MALIBU COUNTRY. It's 2013's Hope & Faith.

TAMRA BARNEY - I dunno... She said they asked her to play herself.

HEATHER DUBROW - Say wha now? MALIBU COUNTRY wouldn't do that... Would they?

TAMRA BARNEY  - Not sure, but I'm about to stick my tongue on some ice to see what happens.

HEATHER DUBROW - That's a bad idea.

TAMRA BARNEY - **incomprehensibly** Too late. **hangs up**

HEATHER DUBROW - **whispers to herself** Malibu Country.

The women go snowmobiling...

VICKI GUNVALSON  - Can't we go faster? I've been riding snowmobiles since I was born!

GRETCHEN ROSSI - If you're trying to impress us, you're failing indiscrepancyly.

VICKI GUNVALSON- Oh yeah? How about this? **drives off course into a ditch, pees herself** 

GRETCHEN ROSSI   - I'm starting to really appreciate my 34 year old body and it's bladder function.


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