Sunday, June 30, 2013

Princesses: Long Island Recap, Episode 5 - "Intermenschion"

Erica has polyps in her anus.

Erica meets her boyfriend Rob by the water...

ROB - It smells like shit here.

ERICA GIMBEL -  Perfect, because the bathroom was where the action was last night.

ROB - What?

ERICA GIMBEL - Er, nothing. **yawns**

ROB - I met you here because I love you and.want to spend more time with you.

ERICA GIMBEL - **yawns** Can we speed this up? I have a big day tomorrow. Gym, manicure, binge drinking, and Adderall.

ROB - Enough, Erica. People older than 29 shouldn't be out drinking in bars.

BABS - **appears** I vehemently disagree. **chugs Asti.** BRAP. **belches**





Amanda meets with her business partner in her bedroom...

BUSINESS PARTNER - EW! Who wants to look at nasty poo coffee in a cup? It's disgusting! It's fucking GROSS!!!

AMANDA BERTONCINI - I never knew you felt this passionately about the Drink Hanky.

BUSINESS PARTNER -  I do! Liquid in a clear glass is an ABOMINATION!!!

BABS  - **enters with tray** I brought you kids snacks and some lemonade. **lemonade glasses are bare with no drink hanky**

BUSINESS PARTNER - NOOOOOOO!!!! **hurls himself out the window**

AMANDA BERTONCINI - Now that's spontinuity.

BABS - Something's not right with that boy. **picks up leopard drink hanky** Hey! I can use this one for my dildos!

AMANDA BERTONCINI - "Dildos", plural?

BABS - Yeah, so?





Joey and her dad take their boat out on the Long Island Sound... 

JOEY'S DAD - We need to talk about why you always claim to be the independent girl among your friends but you still live with me rent free, and we are on our own private boat.

JOEY LAUREN -  Dad, I'm working on Kissamint for the indepemint woman! It's sex in a stick!

JOEY'S DAD - Great. What every father wishes for his daughter. Maybe you just need to work harder?

JOEY LAUREN  - I can't work any harder than this!!!! PS - don't take the boat too far out because I'm partying in the city tonight.




Chanel and Casey stage an intervention at Chanel's house...

CASEY COHEN - I can't get over what I saw. A person. Drinking alcohol. Drunk.

ERICA GIMBEL - Granted, you seem to have trouble getting over things.

CASEY COHEN- We're supposed to be getting married soon, to men who don't yet exist. Not drinking alcohol.

ERICA GIMBEL - YOLO, baby.

CHANEL OMARI -  Well, this is going well. **leaves**


THE END.

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