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| Kim + Shengo = kangaroo babies. |
SHENGO - G'day, mate.
KIM KARDASHIAN - Oh, Shengo. You know I don't speak Portuguese.
SHENGO - Sorry. Hello, friend.
KIM KARDASHIAN - So much better. What's the plan for today?
SHENGO - Well, since I'm your bodyguard, I figured you'd make the plans and I'd follow you around to make sure no one kills you. Because that's what bodyguards do.
KIM KARDASHIAN - Hmmmm. What if we had sex in front of cameras instead?
SHENGO - Do I still get paid?
KIM KARDASHIAN - Of course.
SHENGO - Ok, then. **they start to do it**
SCOTT DISICK - **drives through the bedroom door in his new Phantom** Hey, I'm here with my boss Keith Frankel and his weird friend Gooch.
KIM KARDASHIAN - Um, excuse us?
SCOTT DISICK - Sup, Dingo.
SHENGO - Hey, man.
SHENGO - Hey, man.
KIM KARDASHIAN - It's Shengo.
SCOTT DISICK - Whatevs. You know I don't pay attention to anybody, ever.
KIM KARDASHIAN - Scott, we're kind of busy here.
SCOTT DISICK - I know. That's why I brought my bosses in to watch.
KEITH FRANKEL - Being good at golf and buying fancy cars doesn't impress us much, to quote the wonderful Miss Shania Twain.
GOOCH - What really impresses us is access to Kim Kardashian's bedroom while she bumps uglies with her Australian bodyguard.
KIM KARDASHIAN - Ew, can you not say things like "bump uglies"? It's disgusting.
GOOCH - You wanna know what's disgusting? Dingo's love handles. Hit the elliptical, buddy.
KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN - How's it going, peeps? Wait - what the fuck is THAT?
SHENGO - I know it's kind of bent, but it's not that unidentifiable, is it?
KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN - No, I mean the Phantom.
SCOTT DISICK - Sounds like you already know what it is.
KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN - Scott, you know we can't afford that!
SCOTT DISICK - Yes, we can.
KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN - I know. But I'm trying out the harpy suburban wife role. Good for ratings.
KEITH FRANKEL - I like it.
KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN - Back off, bloaty.
KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN - Seriously. Get the fuck out.
KEITH FRANKEL - Will do.
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