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| Scott Disick kills a man with his bare hands. And looks damn good doing it. |
RANDOM DRUNK DUDE - Hey girl. What do me, Reggie Bush, Miles Austin and Melissa Rivers all have in common?
KIM KARDASHIAN - You've all appeared on the E! network?
RANDOM DRUNK DUDE - Well, yes. But I was going to make a joke about how we've all been burrowed inside that fine rump o' yours. Me, only in the future sense, of course.
KIM KARDASHIAN - Good one.
RANDOM DRUNK DUDE - Thanks. I've always pictured myself as sort of a Dane Cook-Lite. Irreverent, yet fully focused on the current -
RANDOM DRUNK CHICK - **interrupts while wearing an offensively high ponytail** What the fuck you doing talking to my man?
KIM KARDASHIAN - Huh? He came up to me talking about Melissa Rivers camping out in my ass.
RANDOM DRUNK CHICK - Oh yeah? I should be honored that someone as gorgeous and sex-tapeually proficient as yourself would deem my plebeian boyfriend as worthy enough to even spit on. But... I'm not. Fuck you, whore.
SCOTT DISICK - **in a Mr. Belding voice** Hey hey hey, what is going on here?
RANDOM DRUNK CHICK - Your baby mama's sister responded when my boyfriend spoke to her!
SCOTT DISICK- She did? Way out of line, Kim. **punches Kim in the stomach.**
KIM KARDASHIAN - Ow! That fuckin' hurt!
KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN- Scott, I thought we had worked out your anger issues. Dr. Drew said it stems from your strained relationship with your paternal grandmother and her pet chimp.
SCOTT DISICK - Daniel. Daniel was his name. And he was a first-class asshole. But I'm not angry. I just felt like punching you sister in the stomach.
KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN - Oh. Ok. She's not even my favorite, so it's cool.
KHLOE KARDASHIAN- And I can see why. Would Kim ever do this? **humps Henry, the blow-up giraffe.**
KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN - You so crazy! **they roll around on the ground together.**
KIM KARDASHIAN - I'm so pissed I'm going to take off all my clothes and pose for a photograph!
SCOTT DISICK - You show 'em, Kim. You show 'em.
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