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MELISSA GORGA - Hi, honey! How was your day?
JOE GORGA - Fuck off.
MELISSA GORGA - Uh, wha?
GINO GORGA - Mommy's poisoning daddy.
JOE GORGA - That's right, Gino. She's a very bad lady.
MELISSA GORGA - Oh, is this about me not wanting to have sex last night?
JOE GORGA - Yep. And the night before that and the night before that.
GINO GORGA - That's pretty terrible, Mommy. The Gorgas are very sexual men.
JOE GORGA - Smart kid.
TERESA GIUDICE - **enters with blue envelope, Caroline and Jacqueline in tow** Hiya, I gotta letter to give ya.
JACQUELINE LAURITA - We all spent a week working on it.
CAROLINE MANZO - It took so much effort to formulate those words that I had to leave my hair wet.
JOE GORGA - I like it. Very Annie Lennox.
CAROLINE MANZO - Thank you.
TERESA GIUDICE - Well... Open it!
JOE GORGA - You read it, Melissa. I read at a second grade level, and by that I mean at the level of an illiterate second grader.
MELISSA GORGA - Fine. Will you forgive me for making you go three nights without sex?
LEBANESE JEFF GOLDBLUM - **enters kitchen with Kathy in Mercedes** Three nights? That's poison!
JOE GORGA - **high-fives him** My man!
KATHY WAKILE - We came to hear the letter-reading, and to show off the car my husband never would have bought for me if we weren't on television.
MELISSA GORGA - Ok, here goes.
Dear Joe,
I'd like to be friends again.
Love, Teresa.
JACQUELINE LAURITA - Sheer poetry. I really have a knack for this.
TERESA GIUDICE - So? Whaddya say?
JOE GORGA - Fine. On one condition. You let me stuff Joe Giudice's body in a White Castle dumpster.
CAROLINE MANZO - Teresa? Think about what you're agreeing to here. Listen to me. I am the female god.
TERESA GIUDICE - **points out the window** Hey, look out there! Vito's on the lawn eating chips off his stomach!
**Everyone turns, Teresa shakes hands with Joe**
TERESA GIUDICE - **when everyone turns back around** That's a disgustin' idea, Giuseppe Gorga! Disgustin'.
CAROLINE MANZO - Female God is proud of you, Tre.
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