Monday, July 12, 2010

Real Housewives of New Jersey Episode 10 - "Country Clubbed"

An image of Albie Manzo recently surfaced, making why he failed out of law school less of a mystery.

ALBIE'S ATTORNEY: You were smart to come to me, Albie. Not only am I the third-best disability lawyer in Bergen County, but I've also managed to keep your parents out of prison after they've broken the femurs of all your K through 12 teachers.

ALBIE MANZO: People go to prison for that? It'll heal. Big deal.

I know, right? Pussies.

ALBIE: Tell me a bit about your credentials. You know, which professional schools you've forced to educate disabled people, and your bra size.

Well, when a kid with Down's couldn't get into Hofstra law, we fought those discriminatory a-holes. I'm proud to report that he's now a partner at Mayer Brown, handling mergers and acquisitions. 38D.

ALBIE: Wow. On both counts.

And one of my clients with Cerebral Palsy went to New Jersey Medical School after a long fight, and became the head of breast augmentation at the Wayne Surgical Center.

Isn't that where Danielle Staub got her work done?

ALBIE'S ATTORNEY: You betcha. He's now the best in the biz.

ALBIE: So what can you do for me? And how many sexual partners have you had?

I can make it so your dumbness disability never becomes an issue in the legal profession again. Seven.

Look out, Rutgers-Newark. I'll be transferring to a law school near you with a 0.004 GPA in no time.

ALBIE'S ATTORNEY: That's the attitude! See you in the utility closet in twenty minutes.

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