Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Real Houswives of Orange County - Season 4 Preview

Oh man. My loins are tingling in anticipation for the new season. Mostly because Vicki talks about her husband Donn and his "love tank."

But the fourth OC season will offer much stimulation for the menfolk, as well. Catfights abound, especially between Tamra Barney and the newest housewife, Gretchen Rossi.

It's clear from the previews that none of the old beyotches like the 30-year old Rossi. For Jeana, Lauri, and Vicki, it's a matter of Gretch's gold-digging, fame-whoring ways. But for the only other pre-menopausal woman on the show, it's a battle for male attention and the title of the "hottest housewife in Orange County." Gretchen seems like an idiot, but anyone who would anoint herself as the best-looking married woman in a county of over 280,000 deserves to be taken down a notch.

I can't imagine that Tamra would have fared much better starring alongside Jo De La Rosa, or anyone younger and more attractive, for that matter. That Tamra surrounds herself with mostly older women is probably not a coincidence.

Other things I'm looking foward to:

  • Josh's heroin addiction. Sorry... I mean the coverage of Josh's heroin addiction.
  • Vicki's family's reaction to her excesses, including a $1 million yacht. Don't they live inland?
  • Jeana feeling on Gretchen's boobies in a public place.
  • Tamra's freak-out in a straw cowboy hat after her gay son reveals his inner-lip tattoo. I think it says "nugget." What the hell is that supposed to mean?
  • Donn Gunvalson naked.
  • Donn Gunvalson's inevitable return to singledom after Vicki goes in search of a new man to get her rapidly drying vadge going again.

-Liz

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