Thursday, April 7, 2011

The Real World Las Vegas Episode 5 - "Playas Gettin' Played"

Adam make a persuasive case against wearing sunglasses in the club. Photo -

At Vanity, the hottest club not on the Strip...

NANY - The busboy has a girlfriend!

HEATHER - That dick. How dare he be in a committed relationship in a town where carrying yard-long penis-shaped plastic containers of strawberry daiquiris in public is not only legal, but encouraged.

NANY - That's exactly what I said when I found out! Oh god... Will I ever find another busboy?

LEROY - There are, like, three hundred busboys in this club alone.

HEATHER - You don't get it! You'll never understand what it's like!

LEROY - Good, I'd rather not know what's it's like to be sad a busboy has a girlfriend.

MIKE MIKE - Where does the busboy take his girlfriend on a date, anyway? McDonalds?

LEROY - HAHA! Go Christian white boy!  You made a joke!

MIKE MIKE - Thanks. I've been trying to find the perfect moment to whip it out.

LEROY - You're really improving. Just need to work on making sure your voice doesn't go up high at the end -

NANY - Um, excuse me? I'm the focus of this week's episode.

NAOMI - Will I ever know how that feels?   

HEATHER - Hmm... Probs not.

**Adam and Maine friends enter the bar**    

ADAM - We from Maine! And we gonna do how Mainers do!

ADAM'S FRIEND - Drink and wear dark sunglasses!

ADAM - Awwwww shit! Maine Department of Corrections Juvenile Services in the HEYOUSE!  **grabs Nany's ass and kisses her.**

NANY - Wow. That was like crack. Which, from what I've heard, is pretty decent in Maine. I need more.

HEATHER - Why did you do that?  You said you were done with him and his red Marionette cheeks.

NANY - He loves me, Heather.

HEATHER - Oh yeah? Why is he making out with that blond version of the female wrestler Chyna?

NANY  - He's just trying to make me jealous, because he loves me so much.

HEATHER - Now he's licking the bouncer's earlobe.

NANY - He's probably just curious about the taste of clean Armenian ear skin. Can you blame him?

HEATHER - Aaaand now he's making out with Dustin. Fuck, I knew that dude was gay.

NANY - Heather, are you suggesting Adam will make out with anything? I thought we were friends.

HEATHER - You're right, sorry. He loves you.

Back at the ranch...

ADAM -  IKEA SUCKS!!!!! **punches picture frame so hard his pinky gets an owie**  

NANY - Don't destroy our economy-brand furnishings. If you want to hit something, hit me. I can take it. 

ADAM - Bleeerrgggg. **pukes out his Pink Taco dinner**  

NANY - Did you hear me? I said I've been abused before.  

ADAM - **passes out** 

NANY - This is really good television right now. Do you even care? 

CAMERA GUY - We care. We'll tack a PSA on the end of the ep. 

NANY - Thanks. That's really what I was going for here.

**Cue Public Service Announcement** 

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